Off-track topic. Bear with me here. You ever see a show or movie in which a man took steps to turn himself into a woman–or already had taken them–in which that person was played by a man? Where the woman was supposed to be serious and believable, that is, not obviously a man in drag.

Because if it’s so realistic that men can do this, why are they so frequently (always, in the ones I’ve seen or can think of off the top of my head–Veronica Mars S1-03, Ally McBeal, Transamerica) played by women?

…let’s not forget the most important lesson of Groundhog Day, which is not that rodents can predict the weather but that guys who can play are hot.

I get a big kick out of this movie, as campy as it is. Can’t say I would ever have thought of making a tribute video, however.

And Jackson and Fran Walsh will executive-produce the two films The Hobbit and a sequel.

But who will direct? Why isn’t Jackson slated to do that himself?

I’m all for this. And that’s the first I’ve heard of it, so, yay, news for a Friday night for me. Let’s hope Chris Carter is okay with pretending like everything after and including the torching of the entire Syndicate in a warehouse simply doesn’t exist. I’m dubious about Amanda Peet, although it is amusing to me to watch a particular actor or actress jump through the hoops of several different writers with an established style (I last saw her doing Sorkinspeak on Studio 60).

As for the other movie mentioned in the article, I’m not at all down with that. I’m already pretending like nothing exists in Trek after First Contact. Why add more stuff that I want to forget to the junk taking up space in my brain?

Chalk X-Men 3 up to the board of movies I have to forget ever existed. Heck, might just roll back over X2 as well.

**SPOILERS** for Enchanted below.

When I heard of the premise of Enchanted, in which a Disney cartoon princess becomes transmuted into real-life New York City, I thought it would be dumb. Then I saw a preview and could not stop laughing. The movie lived up to the trailers’ promise–funny and as good a romantic comedy as any I’ve seen in a long while. Amy Adams and Patrick Dempsey are fantastic as the leads, walking a very difficult line between unbelievable (as in what guy could ever accept a woman coming from nowhere and acting like Disney’s Snow White into his NYC apartment?) and totally credible (and if he did, how could he help falling in love with her?). The movie is deft in accomplishing this–we are willing to forgive logistics non-sequiturs like the villain suddenly appearing as a hot-dog vender or a restaurant waiter attempting to poison Adams’s Giselle merely because that’s how it’s done in the classic cartoons, but give an appreciative nod to Dempsey’s Robert taking the precaution of having his daughter come to his room to sleep for the night because he’s letting a total stranger stay on his couch. A highly realistic thread is Robert’s struggle between his feelings for Giselle and his resistance to their fairy-tale quality and his engagement to a woman he doesn’t love so much, out of his sense of realism and a lurking fear that he must do this for the sake of his daughter’s motherless state–Dempsey conveys all this on his face and in his eyes, finally put to very good use after a few years of dogging hapless Meredith Grey on television. And it is notable that he does not step up to give Giselle The Kiss of True Love, even at the point of her possible death, until released from his former promise by the grating but ultimately goodwilled fiancee. This Austen-esque sense of duty and honor is compelling and, like many other touches, brings a lovely gravity to the movie’s light-hearted hilarity.

When I saw James Marsden as the cartoon Prince Edward, I had a fleeting thought of “I’ve see him before” and flashed a little on Ally McBeal, but still didn’t truly put it together until I saw the credits–he was so convincing and so far out of the last role I’d seen him in, as Cyclops in X-Men, that it was startling. Susan Sarandon gives a suitably evil performance as evil stepmother/wicked queen/poison-apple hag, and Alan Menken and Stephen Schwartz put their long-honed Disney songwriting skills to wickedly funny use, as in Giselle’s housecleaning song that calls all available New York animals and gamely rallies after discovering they’re all “vermin.” And a cameo by The Little Mermaid herself, Jodi Benson, wraps it all up into a nice self-parodying package that manages at the same time to give out a big dose of warm-hearted joy.

Woven of two levels–obvious enough that any little girl who’s ever watched a Disney movie will understand the humor but grown-up enough for adults to enjoy the romance and ridiculous situations–this movie is very well done on a premise that could have proved far more difficult.

For me, I mean. Calm down.

I finally caught up to the bandwagon and saw Order of the Phoenix last week. While it was indeed better than most of the films that have gone before, the thing is, that’s not saying much. I’ve never seen any film get less out of a bigger group of truly amazing talents than the Potter movies do. I understand the primary difficulties of transforming reaonably complicated books into movies, but I no longer feel at all interested in paying $9 to watch the filmmakers tick book events off a list without working them to best emotional advantage–”Now the Dursleys do their schtick; now Umbridge tries to throw out Trelawney; now Dumbledore saves the day.” And poor Dumbledore indeed–Michael Gambon simply can’t cut it. Given the direction for the rest of the cast, I’m not sure it’s entirely his fault, but he exudes no Dumbledore charisma whatsoever. It’s too bad.

“Crystal … duck … ?”

No, crystal skull, as in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

Eah. They’ve been getting title ideas from some of the wrong places, apparently.

But the title won’t bother me nearly as much as some of the rumors E! news is floating.

Other possibilities include the British-born Hurt taking over where a now-retired Sean Connery left off as Indy’s father in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (or playing Albert Einstein, depending on whom you ask); Broadbent playing a bumbling yet useful sidekick à la Denholm Elliot’s Professor Marcus Brody; and Spielberg’s missus, Kate Capshaw, returning as Temple of Doom gal Willie Scott.

Well, yeah, I suppose that everything and everybody ever in it before could come back, but that’s not a good basis for even a rumor. If Indy’s dad is in the script with a different actor behind him, though, I may not bother.

In other news, Karen Allen’s back in, which make’s E!’s bundle of rumors that much weirder: Kate Capshaw back in as well? As I recall, Capshaw’s character’s main weapon is a scream that could curdle milk, while Allen hits people over the head with heavy stuff. No contest.

Update: Both E! and I should look at the frickin’ IMDb page before we post. John Hurt’s character is Abner Ravenwood, not Indy’s dad, and nobody will believe me now but I thought it possible that he would be playing a flashback version of Marion’s dad before I saw E!’s nonsense. Very well then.

Go rent this movie now before I get to the end, as I frequently become disillusioned at the ends of movies that were great until they ended wrong.

That’s about the tenth line I’ve wanted to quote to somebody else. This is the sharpest dialogue I’ve heard in months. When it first came out, though, I remember reading a poor review. I don’t remember where or by whom, but I’m thinking … moron.

Update: I’m stunned. It did not end wrong, an even more remarkable achievement because there were several ways it could have ended wrong, not just the one. Bravo.

Was the Hamster Dance always to Roger Miller’s Robin Hood music?

Cool.

Aside, the people who made this video have one heck of a DVD collection.

H/t Bookworm Room.

I’ve been wondering whether to see it or not, given that I’ve thought most of the other Harry Potter movies were pretty bad. Survey of PetiteDov says: Order of the Phoenix better than the rest and yes, Helena Bonham Carter is still crazy after all these years. Very well then. See it I shall.

Update: Speaking of Helena Bonham Carter, her grandmother was Violet Bonham Carter, née Violet Asquith, daughter of a WWI prime minister and close friend of Winston Churchill. Which I think is pretty cool.

This movie will make you cackle.